Randomness

Pointing to the speed limit sign ahead, he says, "You know it's 45mph until you pass that sign?"

How dare he pull me over and ask rhetorical questions?!

Buffet Girl
by Scoob and Britta

I walk in,
She looks at me,
I smile,
She drops the collard greens,

On her sexy,
white apron,
Buffet girl,
when does your shift end?

Buffet girl, buffet girl, la la-la la la
Buffet girl, buffet girl, la la-la la la

She adjusts,
Her hairnet,
I stutter,
"Is the fried chicken done yet?"

And she cleans up,
The gravy,
Buffet girl,
Please go out with me.

Chorus

Creamed corn,
Collard greens,
Chicken pot pie,
Refried beans.

Chorus
Buffet girl, buffet girl
Can I tell you how I feel?

I wonder who decided maple nut would be a good flavor to put in chocolates.

I like big, juicy hummus burgers with a huge helping of hummus on the side. Mmm...

Last weekend, the boy got upset because I didn't call enough. He wouldn't tell me what was wrong but ceased all communication with me. Today, I baked him cookies, wrote him a poem, and apologized. He still won't tell me if I am forgiven.
I think I'm dating a chick.

Why Justin is a Dumbass:
5. "Oh, I forgot you're a feminist."
4. "You used to be a terrible kisser, but I think you've gotten better!"
3. "I just didn't want to date you at first cause you're sort of a... well, you know."
2. "I just think that it would be disappointing to God if I moved in with an unmarried couple- not that you're immoral or anything."
1. "You know, if you broke up with me, I wouldn't be heartbroken or anything."