Randomness

2011-09-28T21:37:00.001-04:00

Not pregnant. Don't be a cad, Sean.

2010-10-14T15:02:00.003-04:00

me: I'm really debating whether to do the Spinx Half Marathon. I mean, it's 75 bucks for charity, but they'd probably see more of that money if I wrote them a check for 20 and ran 13 miles at home for free. Plus I've already done one this year... but it WAS a lot of fun.James: Was it 75 bucks of fun?me: 75 bucks buys a lot of beer.James: I think you've answered your own question.

2010-10-08T10:51:00.002-04:00

#1: You gonna come with us tonight to Fall for Greenville?#2: No, Fall for Greenville is kinda lame.. unless you just like eating outside and paying in coupons.#1: You're kinda lame.. and all I heard you say was "I'm a wuss"#2: Zing! hurt me bad.#1: And when are we doing stuff for Halloween? I need to find me a costume too. Don't know what I want to be yet.#2: Go as Admiral Ackbar. How

2008-02-14T08:37:00.003-05:00

I wonder what people with office jobs did before the internet was invented.toothpaste for dinner

2008-02-08T11:45:00.000-05:00

James: Did you notice that all states that Huckabee won were hit by a tornado? I think God's making some kind of statement, but why not West Virginia?In retrospect, I think it was their county-elected delegate system that spared them, but I still wouldn't take any chances voting for Huckabee.

2008-02-05T12:51:00.000-05:00

My ineptitude at chit-chat has developed into a fear of running into people that I usually encounter in a group one-on-one, which could be confusing if I ask you if you're going to a party because it may come out in a "you weren't invited... oh" kind of way instead of a "cause if you're not, you should" kind of wayand I'm sorry Alex.

2008-02-01T16:04:00.000-05:00

Me and Ron after a game of frisbee golf.

2008-01-31T17:32:00.000-05:00

Ron Paul and I agree about a lot of things. I'd like think that if we ever met in real life, we'd be like BFF forever. We'd talk about things like dinosaurs and white people, and if I'd say, "Ron, you should come over for D&D tonight," he'd be like "Sure, I'll bring New Castle."That's Ron Paul.

2008-01-28T13:20:00.000-05:00

I almost got three-fourths through World War Z before it started giving me nightmares.

2008-01-16T12:01:00.001-05:00

I just realized that there are such a thing as drafted/non-published posts.4/5/06me: Everything is cooler with wings. Horses become pegasi and lions become griffins.Courtney: ...and maxis become pads with wings and tampons become uncomfortable.4/6/06me: Hey, Jeff! Are those new sunglasses?Jeff: Oh, I didn't recognize you. You look normal today.me: I like them. They take the attention off

2008-01-11T10:14:00.000-05:00

Tonight my 6th level cleric will finish crafting her +2 Cloak of Resistance.

2008-01-09T13:32:00.000-05:00

DVD. yesterday.

2007-12-27T15:45:00.000-05:00

Imagine this:After the final battle in the war of good and evil, Satan travels back in time to kill Mary before she gives birth to Jesus and therefore change the future, but Jesus, learning of this plan, also travels back in time to protect Mary, who falls in love with him and ultimately gives birth to him.(Special thanks to Drew and the plot of Terminator 1.)

2007-10-12T15:45:00.001-04:00

Al Gore is a terrorist.

2007-10-11T13:07:00.000-04:00

Hey Kay, Do you remember that time that you were mad that Fay thought you were faking being sick because she asked where you were and I told her I sent you home because all you did was complain about how much it hurt to talk and I was just tired of listening to you, but then you just laughed? You said, "You got me, Brittany! You got me!"Honestly, Kay, maybe it's you that gets me.

2007-09-24T10:40:00.000-04:00

toothpaste for dinner

2007-09-19T23:56:00.000-04:00

Some guy: Hey, if you like Dr. Strange, you should see Iron Man.James: Fuck Iron Manme: ...and fuck you too.me: Go back to Planet LameJames: ...lameo

2007-09-18T16:52:00.000-04:00

Dragon Wars has got to be the best "A-movie" B-movie I've ever seen.

2007-08-23T16:59:00.000-04:00

I've got an office.. with a desk!!!(Suck it, fast food job.)

2007-07-28T18:01:00.000-04:00

The wedding was kinda difficult to plan because the theme was "Not Cliche"PS Post-Reception Party at Nick's next Saturday night

2007-02-11T23:52:00.000-05:00

Lisa, I promise I won't tell that you thought Bangladesh was a board game if you won't tell that I thought Mazda was a Honda.

2006-11-30T22:34:00.000-05:00

I don't believe in Postmodernism.

2006-11-28T10:55:00.000-05:00

Simon Pegg in Land of the Dead.I didn't believe it.

2006-11-02T15:10:00.000-05:00

"Global warming" is a fallacy perpetuated by godless, tree-hugging hippie liberals.Just like recycling.

2006-10-05T23:42:00.000-04:00

I think I would do a lot better in my classes if I stopped wasting time going to them.

2006-09-29T13:38:00.000-04:00

1. If it's too hot for my hand, it's too hot for my mouth.2. If it's too hot for my hand, it's too hot for my mouth.3. If it's too hot for my hand, it's too hot for my mouth.4. If it's too hot for my hand, it's too hot for my mouth.5. If it's too hot for my hand, it's too hot for my mouth.6. If it's too hot for my hand, it's too hot for my mouth.7. If it's too hot for my hand, it's too hot

2006-09-22T08:16:00.000-04:00

I finally accomplished a goal I've had since freshman year.I went to Real Pizza. It was delicious.

2006-09-19T11:31:00.000-04:00

Charlie: If we're supposed to be sandwich artists, why do they give us portions?Sometimes I have to express myself with more than three olives.

2006-09-12T15:48:00.000-04:00

Envirotard (n.)- people who spread "facts" on the energy crisis esp. the creator of "Kilowatt Ours" which includes a grand total of one expert- a doctor who verifies that air pollution causes aesthema, with no requotable facts and a flimsy experiment performed by changing light bulbs. (It also went as far to say that recycling more would help conserve energy.) Way to go, envirotard.

2006-09-06T12:57:00.000-04:00

Silverfish

2006-09-05T16:13:00.000-04:00

Mike: Living with your parents again is weird because they'll do your laundry, and you're like "Mom! What are you doing?!! I only wore those once! They still had two weeks left in them!"

2006-09-04T20:17:00.000-04:00

James: Britta, I have to ask you something and I want you to answer me as honestly as you can.me: Okay.James: Pirates or ninjas?me: Ninjas.James: Robot or dinosaur?me: Dinosaur.James: Grizzly bear or samurai?me: Grizzly bear. Clearly.James: I think I love you.

2006-08-08T11:53:00.000-04:00

PS I exempted my EM202 exam.Hahahaha.

2006-08-08T11:50:00.000-04:00

While moving out, I found a receipt with some barely legible scribble on the back, "That was not a fart! It was a gurgle!"Hahahaha.

2006-08-04T11:29:00.000-04:00

Kool-aid is best with sugar.

2006-07-26T12:12:00.000-04:00

me: James, why do you always look down on me?James: Because you're a womanme: What?!James: ...which means that you're shorter than me. (pause) You're pretty.

2006-07-07T09:11:00.000-04:00

The band had just finished, and everyone began leaving their spots in the grass. Crossing Main Street, James and I saw fireworks just beginning to light up the sky, and everyone stopped and congregated right there in the middle of the street, and no one even made a sound until the last one went off. It was amazing.Romero is a genius.

2006-06-27T14:33:00.000-04:00

me: Sorry. Brittas aren't good for much- except lovingJames: And making messes.me: ...and making messes.

2006-06-21T15:31:00.000-04:00

From 8am, there is banging, crashing, beeping, and shouting from the construction.We've been paying the power bill for our ENTIRE complex for the past 10 months.The cable company won't let us cancel our service.Our power comes off and on.So does the water.The landlord won't return my phonecalls.I'm so tired.

2006-06-15T09:38:00.000-04:00

Simply irreBrittable.

2006-06-12T11:56:00.000-04:00

"Britta is my favorite contact sport." -James

2006-06-09T09:37:00.000-04:00

You know that friend that always has to overcalculate everything? Like, you say "Wow, that's a 30% tip!" and they have to correct you, "No! That's like a...(5 years later) 32.5% tip! Wow!"That's me.

2006-06-06T11:43:00.000-04:00

Philip snores.

2006-05-26T19:28:00.000-04:00

That's right- in a relationship.Looks like somebody owes me ice cream.

2006-05-23T20:48:00.000-04:00

Sometimes when you dwell on someone failing and they do, it still doesn't make you feel any better.

2006-05-05T17:05:00.000-04:00

"Heirs to the dead are dead, and what they inherit is dead. Heirs to the living are alive, and they inherit both the living and the dead. The dead inherit nothing, for how could a dead person inherit? If a dead person inherits the living, the living will not die and the dead will come to life." NHC II, 3..and that's why Philip got kicked out of the Bible.

2006-05-03T20:07:00.000-04:00

Dearest Leah,I just assumed we all graduated the third grade. Sorry.Lovest, Britta

2006-05-01T20:41:00.000-04:00

He broke up with her because she didn't want him to have anything to do with me anymore.Thank you for not giving up on me and never going back on a promise.

2006-05-01T00:40:00.000-04:00

Dear Aston Motes's mom and dad,I just assumed we all graduated the third grade. Sorry.Love, Britta

2006-05-01T00:32:00.000-04:00

But there are......good things about Roosters.

2006-04-29T22:16:00.000-04:00

Things I learned today:1. Better to cover up little lies with bigger lies.2. Studying with cute boys is difficult.3. Dr. Han is a monster.

2006-04-28T23:39:00.000-04:00

All night long.Study breaks welcome.

2006-04-28T14:33:00.000-04:00

Aida,I'm sorry I called you a Jew..but if you were, you'd be Jew-tiful.Love, Britta

2006-04-27T01:47:00.000-04:00

"Ten million strong and growing" is the Flinstones vitamin slogan.What the hell is that even supposed to mean?

2006-04-25T16:44:00.000-04:00

I only miss you when you're not around.

2006-04-21T09:36:00.000-04:00

I wish the internet weren't so close to Facebook.

2006-04-20T18:56:00.000-04:00

"Man Bites Mailman HOUMA, La. — A mail carrier got bitten — by a barking man, police said. Mark D. Plumb, 20, of Butler, Mo., was arrested and charged with simple battery after he ran barking from a house and bit the letter carrier on the shoulder, police spokesman Lt. Todd Duplantis said. Plumb said he bit the carrier as a joke, and has no history of criminal activity or mental illness, police

2006-04-20T08:30:00.000-04:00

Edit: We take comfort in God, but God also takes comfort in us.

2006-04-20T00:29:00.000-04:00

Not me.

2006-04-19T01:50:00.000-04:00

Instead of singing the chorus, I just repeat your name over and over.

2006-04-17T22:57:00.000-04:00

I shall name it Cocoffee.

2006-04-17T10:20:00.000-04:00

Sometimes I doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.

2006-04-14T13:38:00.000-04:00

Z.A. drill @ Table Rock!If you can't make it tonight, how will you make it in 2012?

2006-04-14T08:38:00.000-04:00

Dear Ben,I'm going to marry your daddy and be your mom.Love, Britta

2006-04-12T00:26:00.000-04:00

Don't change your answers. Please don't ever change your answers; just wait for a guy with the right questions.-my favorite ex

2006-04-11T08:29:00.000-04:00

Who will take care of me when you're not around?

2006-04-11T00:59:00.000-04:00

I love Courtney oh yes I do-do. And Liz is awesome. And people need to start showin some love. yeah people, before humanity ends.And Emily needs to stay away from Potter. And I don't know who these people are.Edit: Courtney wrote that. I like Emily and Potter.

2006-04-10T01:02:00.000-04:00

I crash proms to pick up guys.

2006-04-09T18:50:00.000-04:00

They finally found where the skylights were coming from. Regardless of both having to use the bathroom really badly, they followed the lights halfway from Anderson all the way to the Brooks Center. In the end, the girls made three U-turns before finally resting their eyes on half a dozen empty chairs surrounding the three large rotating beams. Courtney and Britta giggled as they ran up to it.

2006-04-07T14:46:00.000-04:00

Everything's more fun on Powerpoint Presentations!!!!

2006-04-06T05:46:00.000-04:00

Big kids turn air mattresses into little kid catapults.

2006-04-05T18:20:00.001-04:00

me: Peeps are the second best seasonal candy after candy corn.Courtney: Yeah, I hate conversational hearts. I wish they had more real-life phrases like "I'm Too Busy in My Life Right Now for a Relationship."<3.

2006-04-04T17:04:00.000-04:00

boy: Can I kiss you?me: No, it's Lent.PS I also gave up reading your poetry.

2006-04-02T23:18:00.000-04:00

I'm turning into Alia!!

2006-03-31T14:26:00.000-05:00

I made grilled cheese with the nichrome wire from my toaster and a lawnmower battery.

2006-03-30T22:57:00.000-05:00

I had to write a book report for the first time since high school. I called it, "Big Fish Eat Small Fish and the Worthlessness of Everything for Which We Stand."I thought it was good.

2006-03-27T14:11:00.000-05:00

Götterdämmerung • \gher-ter-DEM-uh-roong\ • noun: a collapse (as of a society or regime) marked by catastrophic violence and disorder; broadly : downfallMerriam-Webster

2006-03-19T19:57:00.001-05:00

The bass player in The Matches totally insulted my roommate.It was so cool.

2006-03-16T15:23:00.000-05:00

Armen bo barmen, don't leave me bo beave me!

2006-03-11T18:49:00.000-05:00

I like to think of all my relationships as works of art

2006-03-10T14:22:00.000-05:00

Have you ever been on a bad date and you both can kinda feel it and what you really want to say is "Hey, let's not do this anymore" and you know they're thinking it but you want to say it first and it just won't slide into conversation and then they just blurt it out and you want to say "Oh yeah?! Well, I was thinking it first!" but it comes out like "Oh really?" in a pathetic-sounding way?

2006-03-06T15:02:00.000-05:00

Punks are the natural enemies of hippies.I thought you were better than that.

2006-03-01T13:51:00.000-05:00

"i came home today, walked up to my door, pointed my keys at the knob, and punched the "unlock" button that goes to my car.i think school may be damaging my mental health."-kathernyac

2006-02-25T14:17:00.000-05:00

R.I.P.James & Britta1/28/06 - 2/23/06Two wrinkled peas in a retard pod.(James thought up the last part.)

2006-02-21T18:38:00.000-05:00

The most famous joke in the world has no punch line.

2006-02-20T21:28:00.000-05:00

My favorite thing about Starbursts is that when you suck on one while drinking water, you can imagine it's a fountain of Kool-Aid.My least favorite thing about Starbursts is the name. I would've called it xXxFRUITCORExXx.

2006-02-17T13:26:00.000-05:00

My boyfriend can out-robot your boyfriend.

2006-02-16T15:37:00.000-05:00

me: I'm a baseball cap. James once compared all his exs to hats, and he said I was a baseball cap.Liz: So what does that make everyone else? Dandruff?Liz and BrittaBFF FOREVER

2006-02-12T04:32:00.000-05:00

Best weekend ever.

2006-02-12T04:31:00.000-05:00

Please check your techno at the door.

2006-02-07T17:14:00.000-05:00

Hold me like a monkey.

2005-12-01T23:27:00.000-05:00

A man came into the store today, bought a bag of chips, and fought over the change so much that he managed to confuse the cashier into charging him again and then giving him forty dollars.On the other hand, Jeff is a moron.

2005-11-30T01:00:00.000-05:00

Be careful when washing clothes with Velcro.

2005-11-17T23:08:00.000-05:00

"Patience is the best remedy for every trouble"...unless you're drowning.

2005-11-16T23:41:00.000-05:00

Any animal can be paper-trained if the paper is big enough.

2005-11-12T14:32:00.000-05:00

Ruffles is a dumb name for a snack chip.

2005-11-08T14:26:00.000-05:00

me: Baby, I think you're the greatest.James: I love this show!me: What?!James: ...and you. I love this show and you.

2005-10-26T23:08:00.000-04:00

I pick my nose sometimes too.

2005-10-25T14:53:00.000-04:00

Don't call me 'little lady'.

2005-10-20T16:19:00.000-04:00

"i love it when you're with people you don't know all that well and you think everything is cool, then you come home and look in the mirror and there's mascara half-way down your face. that's AWESOME." -kathrynac